It's true, I have two friends who are not married now. My friend Bennington and Nash are the remainders, the remnants... And Nash is getting married next year on the 5th of April.
That leaves Bennington and me.
The wedding was intense with the procession decked out in full regalia. The air was dry, of high altitude, and could have carried a fart audibly for two miles if it had not been for the fire trucks straightening the curves of some strange forrest that ironically housed signs informing us of a low fire assessment.
Orange Boy looked like he was about to rip out of his skin, and Melbatoast was crying on the way in, I thought that it might go south for minute, but alcohol fixed every inconsistancy, and many pictures were taken. I was on B-roll and my hands would not stop shaking. I am not sure if it was the 48 hours without sleep, insufficient nourishment, or the fact of knowing a close friend was getting hitched, but my hands quivered like a God damned epilectic jacking off to a Pokemon cartoon.
All in all it went well, but not without its quirks... There was the drama, the hook ups, and the excessive consumption of alcohol, and yes, the inevitable black out for staight out fatigue. I naturally caught shit for this and there is a photo circulating of me and an armless CPR dummy sharing a moment. It is to be expected.
Somewhere in the fog the two made it to a limo and left our presense, and I compensated the loss by making a complete jackass of myself. My only hope is that the people attending the after-after party at Nash's house were more fried than I was.
Only time will tell.