My run in with Joe the "Plumber"

For some odd reason he didn't respond after that.

God is for idiots

The more things change...

The more they stay the same.















- Mildly Brilliant

The things we do remember...

I've been forgetting things of late and remembering things I have long forgotten.  Today I remembered this little bit of comedy because a friend of mine from across the country posted something about Joan Crawford.  This bloke from Leicester England used to work with me over ten years ago.  He insisted I listen to this comedy team Derek & Clive, which in reality are Dudley Moore & Peter Cook.  I lost contact over the years and had completely forgotten about this bit until today.

A Lesson in Humility

So this boy (actually he is 18, but still a boy in my eyes) who works at one of the stores I clean at night finds me on my hands and knees trying to get a black streak out that has been scratched into the wax. He mocks me by yelling:

 "Yeah!!!! Get that stain!!!"

 I just ignore him because I am trying to keep my blood pressure and bloodlust down these days. He then proceeds to ask me:

 "Do you really enjoy your job?"

 Stupid people either think I can't spot their condescension or that I am afraid to call them out, so I smile looking up at him and say:

 "You know, people have this misconception that ninja dressed in black pajamas all the time and nothing could be farther from the truth. In most cases they dressed as the imperial gardeners. Why? because no one cares what conversations are held within ear shot of the lowly gardeners. And when someone was poisoned or their throat was slashed; no one suspected the guy trimming the hedges… Besides, I make four dollars an hour more than you."

 For some reason he didn't have a retort or any more asinine questions for me. I wonder why?

Begin Again.

Let Go.

On the 11th Anniversary of 9-11

Opus 9 Nocturne Number 2 plays in the background, a fitting melancholy song to play on such a day of infamy. I dare not turn on the TV for fear of the clown car cavalcade of sycophants in search of ratings engaging in faux sympathy for those unfortunate souls, and the inevitable skyrocketing of my blood pressure through the stratosphere when I hear more mindless jingoism which proves we haven't learned a damn thing since then. Sure we will never forget. But will we ever figure out why? And will we remember how we were subject to the most cynical of politics and lied into an unrelated war in their name? Or will we just remember the posters, flags, pundits, and slogans as we talk of our next bogeyman in Syria or Iran? Perhaps we should do more than buy cheap made-in-China "American" flags and watch specials... Perhaps we should do more than remember how they died. Perhaps we should be asking ourselves why, and then crack open a damned history book. It's the least we can all do.

An Excellent Explanation of the Tea Party

I need to see this movie.

An Open Letter to Lou Pritchett

I absolutely despise chain letters.  There is no quicker way for a steaming pile of disinformation to travel.  People love their gossip, and there is no faster way to travel in the information age than e-mail.  Enter the chain letter: Generally a clumsily written piece of fiction asserting "too good to be true" claims that claims to be written by a person that "this actually happened to".  Despite the fact that almost everyone who has ever been on Internet knows of at least one search engine, only a small percentage of people actually copy and past segments from chain letters to check on their validity.

As you may have already guessed, I make it a habit to debunk chain letters and various bird droppings of disinformation on social media sites that my friends and family frequent, and unfortunately, propagate.  Every once in a blue moon though, I get a chain e-mail that originally came from the source that it claims to have come from.  This is the case with Lou Pritchett's open letter to Obama".  While it does originate from Lou, it does contain a bunch fear-mongering, hyperbole, and downright disinformation: not to mention it was originally written sometime in 2009, but is still passed around to this day to make points in political arguments.  So when I got this in my inbox I decided it was high time I wrote an open letter to Lou Pritchett:

Dear Lou Pritchett,

I have been getting an open letter sent to me by friends and family that claims to be written by you.  According to urban legends section of about.com it is.  You make some pretty outrageous claims and raise some very anxious questions like I would like to respond to.  So as not to take you out of context, I am leaving you letter intact but in bold font to differentiate from my responses and addressing each line point by point:

 AN OPEN LETTER TO PRESIDENT OBAMA

"Dear President Obama:

You are the thirteenth President under whom I have lived and unlike any of the others, you truly scare me."

So Nixon saying "when the President does it, that means that it is not illegal", which means he believed he was above the Constitution, that didn't truly scare you? 

"You scare me because after months of exposure, I know nothing about you."

Maybe you should read a magazine or watch something on T.V. besides Fox "News" because it isn't exactly like the guy hasn't been thoroughly vetted and talked about on a daily basis for four years now.

"You scare me because I do not know how you paid for your expensive Ivy League education and your upscale lifestyle and housing with no visible signs of support."

It's called a scholarship.  Some of us little people who work hard scholastically get them from time to time.  His wife is a successful lawyer as well, and believe it or not there are other successful African American families out there besides the Huxtables, and their origins of wealth aren't clandestine.

"You scare me because you did not spend the formative years of youth growing up in America and culturally you are not an American."

Ooooo… He grew up for a couple of years in Indonesia… OOooooooo… He can't possibly be American.  We get it, you're exploiting some peoples xenophobic tendencies by suggesting his "otherness" over and over; whether it claiming his Birth Certificate is a forgery, or that his real name is Barry Soetoro. I get it, you think he is not one of us.

"You scare me because you have never run a company or met a payroll.

Really?  I don't seem recall that being criteria for being President of the United States of America. Maybe because isn't. Oh and by the way: his job is to run a government, not a business.

"You scare me because you have never had military experience, thus don't understand it at its core."

Again, not a requirement.  Bill Clinton didn't serve in the military and this country was prosperous for his two terms.

"You scare me because you lack humility and 'class', always blaming others."

Wow, that's a pretty nice claim you got there.  Why didn't you do the classy thing and offer a quote or something?  Perhaps because you were pulling it out of your ass?  Speaking of humility, did you notice how ommitted the two paragraphs talking about yourself at the beginning of the letter?

"You scare me because for over half your life you have aligned yourself with radical extremists who hate America and you refuse to publicly denounce these radicals who wish to see America fail."

Show me these radical extremists he is supposedly aligning with "who wish to see America fail."  Are you sure you aren't taking a preacher's words out of context and hyperventilating?  Because that is what it sounds like.

"You scare me because you are a cheerleader for the 'blame America' crowd and deliver this message abroad." 

Critiquing social injustices or wanting to change undesirable elements of our country doesn't mean one is part of the "Blame Amerca" crowd.  It just means one lives in reality and realizes that things don't change if problems aren't addressed.

"You scare me because you want to change America to a European style country where the government sector dominates instead of the private sector."

You mean where the government actually governs business like it is supposed too?  Or are you talking about the GM bailout that was successful?

"You scare me because you want to replace our health care system with a government controlled one."

You mean the mandate for everyone to purchase healthcare from existing private healthcare that was originally proposed by Republican Presidential candidate Bob Dole in 1993?  Hmmm, when I say it like that it sounds less like some secret soviet plot then when you do.  I wonder why that is?

"You scare me because you prefer 'wind mills' to responsibly capitalizing on our own vast oil, coal and shale reserves."

Yes because developing technologies that harness the free energy radiating from sun is a stupid idea.  Can you believe they gave some Einstein a Nobel Peace Prize for such a goofy idea?

"You scare me because you want to kill the American capitalist goose that lays the golden egg which provides the highest standard of living in the world."

Do you have any proof to back up this hyperbole? I didn't think so.

"You scare me because you have begun to use 'extortion' tactics against certain banks and corporations."

And what extortion tactics are these? Proof would be nice, because as far as the rest of us in reality are concerned, the banks are doing just fine.

"You scare me because your own political party shrinks from challenging you on your wild and irresponsible spending proposals."

You know something I noticed? Republicans think Democrats like to spend more money than Republicans even though the Congressional Budget Office says otherwise. It's rather odd because the CBO is saying that Obama has the lowest spending President since Dwight D. Eisenhower. It would seem someone is lying here.

You scare me because you will not openly listen to or even consider opposing points of view from intelligent people.

You mean like when Obama bent over backwards for Republican Senator Chuck Grassley only for him to vote against his own provision?

You scare me because you falsely believe that you are both omnipotent and omniscient.

Oh you have proof that he believes that right? Or are you engaging in a strawman argument?

You scare me because the media gives you a free pass on everything you do.

Ah the old "librul media" canard. Even your leaders admit it is so:

"I admit it : The liberal media were never that powerful and the whole thing was often used as an excuse by conservatives for conservative failures." --William Kristol

"I've gotten balanced coverage and broad coverage - all we could have asked. ... For heaven sakes, we kid about the liberal media, but every republican on earth does that." --Pat Buchanan

"You scare me because you demonize and want to silence the Limbaughs, Hannitys, O'Relllys and Becks who offer opposing, conservative points of view."

Again, I ask for proof. As far as a sane person can tell, FOX is still on the air and all those personalities are still telling their lies unabated. Obama has not proposed doing anything to them at all. You talk a big game, but you lack in points.

"You scare me because you prefer controlling over governing."

Huh? do you think before you type? What the hell do you think the government is there for? From Merriam-Westbster's online dictionary:

gov·ern verb \ˈgə-vərn\ Definition of GOVERN transitive verb 1 a : to exercise continuous sovereign authority over; especially : to control and direct the making and administration of policy in b : to rule without sovereign power and usually without having the authority to determine basic policy 2 a archaic : manipulate b : to control the speed of (as a machine) especially by automatic means 3 a : to control, direct, or strongly influence the actions and conduct of b : to exert a determining or guiding influence in or over [income must govern expenditure] c : to hold in check : restrain 4 : to require (a word) to be in a certain case 5 : to serve as a precedent or deciding principle for

"Finally, you scare me because if you serve a second term I will probably not feel safe in writing a similar letter in 8 years."

Yes because he has ramrodded legislation like the Patriot Act which has watered down many of our rights... Oh wait, that was the previous administration. If you are so concerned about your eroding civil liberties, why weren't you voicing your concerns during the Bush Administration?

Ok that pretty much wraps up your letter. It appears you are a very anxious man considering that you wrote "you scare me" twenty times in your letter. I suggest getting a night light and stop listening to crap from the John Birch Society.

Sincerely,

D.W. from Mildly Brilliant

Some of my favorite Twitter Smack-downs

There is nothing I enjoy more than people in 140 characters or less... Especially when they are the often insulated politicians, pundits, and concern trolls that carry water for them.  Of course I wouldn't have to do this if the media did their goddamned jobs, but just like everything the right claims, the liberal media meme is a goddamned lie. So in leu of actual journalists calling out the bull, I am more than happy to cut these chumps down to size. So crack open a beer and put on some ass-kicking music because here are a few of my favorite tweets.

George Will & The Donald

- Mildly Brilliant

The more things change...

...The more they stay the same. Women suffragettes stand in protest at the 1920 Republican National Convention.

Links With Your Tea

This morning's theme: How crazy is the American Right Wing? And why?

Study shows what we've known all along, but we've been too damn polite to say: Conservatism Thrives on Low Intelligence and Poor Information.

Paul Krugman weighs in on Romney's "Severe Conservative" Freudian slip of a gaffe, and how we got here.

Bill Moyers interviews Bruce Bartlett on Where the Right Went Wrong.

Bill Maher Unbaptizes Mitt Romney's Father-In-Law

Quote du Jour

"Another means of silently lessening the inequality of property is to exempt all from taxation below a certain point, and to tax the higher portions of property in geometrical progression as they rise.

Whenever there is in any country, uncultivated lands and unemployed poor, it is clear that the laws of property have been so far extended as to violate natural right. The earth is given as a commonstock for man to labour and live on."

--Thomas Jefferson

Why the left needs to get comfortable with guns...

FOX's Greg Gutfeld gushes over a Xmas card where kids are posing with hand guns and the father is pointing a gun at his wife.

"I like it because it scares the hell out of visiting Europeans who already think we’re crazy people and they think my god, we’re never invading this country. Number two: it’s a reminder to all you Occupy Wall Streeters that if there is a revolution, the other side is better armed."

They are itching for it, and unstable times encourage unstable people to do irrational and violent things. And when you have a "News" organization encouraging it and disseminating crazy like (M)Ann Coulter...

Breaking News: Man raised by gay couple turns out to be normal!!! Whodduh thunk it?!?

Here's a man who was raised by a lesbian couple. You will notice for all intensive purposes that he is completely normal. That is because the parents sexual orientation has nothing to do with a child's orientation. So, James Dobson, Rick Santorum, and the rest of the GOP: Stop blaming the ails of society on the Irish, Indians, Blacks, Jews, Gays.

FDR Warning about those who would "reform" Social Security.

What are you gonna do with your life?

- Mildly Brilliant

Movie Review for Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides

Eight years ago when I saw a preview for the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie come out, I peed myself just a little. As a child, I loved the ride, the song, and the general idea of being a pirate, so I couldn't wait for the movie to come out. Still, in the back of my mind, I was aware of what Disney does to movies, so I didn't have too high of expectations. The movie turned out to be what all us kids inside always dreamt about: buccaneers, swashbuckling swordplay, daring rescues, romance and adventure on the high seas... Plus Johnny Depp.

Of course it had it minor hiccups, Orlando Bloom's character was, for lack of better words, a complete douche, and two men managed to pull a capsized dingy with a giant air bubble underwater... somehow. It still was a good movie and it had a decent and easy to follow plot: Cursed Aztec gold, undead pirates, young love, and the quintessential villainous pirate Captain Barbosa, as played masterfully by Geoffrey Rush. I didn't even mind the CGI. But after going from feats of semi-plausibility (often explained by supernatural conditions in the first Pirates) to Jack somersaulting from across a ravine while strapped to a pole and his knee caps somehow don't launch into the stratosphere... To seeing how many laws of physics can we break while countless pirates swing between two ships circling a Maelstrom to cross swords with immortal monsters while simultaneously performing a wedding--I didn't have that high of expectations for the fourth installment.

With this in mind, an old friend and I went see the midnight showing. That said, I was still let down. The elements are all there, the familiar musical score by Hans Zimmer, the iconic characters like Jack Sparrow, Hector Barbosa, Master Gibbs are there help you feel at home, but it is like returning home after you left for college... At first you are nostalgic, but then you realize it is just the remnants of an era... long gone. The movie is about Captain Jack Sparrow and seemingly everybody else's quest for the Fountain of Youth, as you might have guessed, it comes off contrived and convoluted, even more so than the second and third movies, but without Bill Nighy (Davy Jones) to offer up an intriguing antagonist.

Instead you have the dreaded Blackbeard (Ian McShane) whose most interesting scene is his introduction where he comes out with burning hemp wicks in his beard, something the historical Edward Teach was known for. Then he points his sword which apparently animates the ropes of the ship, which is never explained why or how, and turns them against the crew. Teach also has magic voodoo powers and turns his crew into zombies that can't be killed, which like the sword and why I paid $11 to see this movie, has no explanation.

Penelope Cruz plays the daughter Blackbeard could give exactly two flying shits about, and is a stereotypical hot tempered and traitorous Latin bitch, unlike every other movie I have ever seen her in. And to fill the slot of the obligatory douche character, a slot previously filled by Orlando Bloom, is a two dimensional missionary played by some jack off I am too lazy to look up, who, incidentally, is trying to save Black Beard's soul. The only cool element of the movie is that they portrayed mermaids as what they were in the minds of the ancient greeks: monsters. Of course, Disney finds a way to ruin that by having one of the mermaids fall in love with Massengill boy in an onscreen romance that an upwards of maybe three people in the theatre gave a shit about.

I found myself wondering when it was going to be over and my friend almost fell asleep. And most tellingly, at the end of the movie no one in the audience clapped. All in all, Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides is a movie you might want to see at matinee or on Blu-Ray. I give it a C-