Recooperating with a sushi breakfast.

Recooperating with a sushi breakfast.
Originally uploaded by Mildly Brilliant

After a serious bout of drinking and kareokeing at Brian's House I sometimes spoil myself with some raw fish. After all, I have to absorb all that alcohol so I can partake in communion at the Church of Awesomeness tonight. From the moment I sat down things were going bad, my stomach was turning from the mixed drinks of last night, and the country music videos on the flat-screens behind the bar was unbearable. Just then, one of the older Japanese waitress' cell phone started belting out a Mariah Carey tune. Meanwhile, the restaurant's speakers started playing Whitney Houston's theme song from the Bodyguard.

It was a miracle I kept my food down.

Obama picks Biden for VP.

I am not surprised by this at all, but this going to piss off a few people. For starters, I am not a fan of Joe Biden, but I think this will really really anger the Hillary P.U.M.A. crowd. I believe that an Obama/Clinton ticket would have brought a higher turn out come November, and Biden's negative is the same as Hillary's, that he is a career politician and hardly is a picture of "change". Not that I am a fan of Hillary, but we need her zealous followers' votes, and she doesn't put her foot in her mouth nearly as much as Biden.

The Top Five Wingnut Obama Smears

From Obama being a secret Muslim to Obama being the next Adolf Hitler, Alternet has five stupidest anti-Obama smears for your reading pleasure.

Troll Talk: The Douche Bag Awards

Uh oh, it looks like I might have to reverse my decision to give the former Pizza Hut employee who implicated himself for extortion with a picture from his cell phone because

This is a cult. Not a religion. Give yourself the douche bag of the week.

-Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

Thank you for nominating me for the "Douche Bag of Week" award. I appreciate your clarity on the subject. You are correct to identify my off the cuff remark regarding a need for more ole timey religion is clearly more foolish than the self implicating photo of the Pizza Hut guy's car and license plate. Unfortunately, were I to award myself this prestigious accolade it might be considered a conflict of interest on my part, so I am going to have to respectfully decline. Please don't think that your courageous attempt of anonymously rebuking me on my own blog will go without merit, it's just that I don't have an award in place to recognize such bravery. However, I do have a sheet of gold star stickers. I hope this will suffice.

-Buck

Douche bag of the week

Reprinted from Yahoo News:

ELKO, Nev. - A man accused of trying to extort $500 from a Pizza Hut in Elko was foiled by his own cell phone camera. Police said a former employee of the restaurant allegedly called the manager on Friday and told him he had five Pizza Hut signs that are used on the roofs of vehicles and wouldn't return them unless he was paid $500.

Police said the manager wanted proof that Long had the signs. So the 23-year-old man sent him a cell phone picture that proved to be his undoing.

Officers were able to zoom in on license plate numbers of two vehicles in the background that are registered to the man.

He's been charged with extortion, possession of stolen property and grand larceny. Bail is set at $15,000.

Ok, where to start?

1. If you are going to risk going to jail for extortion, it should be worth it. Five hundred dollars isn't even enough to pay a month's worth of rent in most places.

2. If you are going to send photographic evidence that you have stolen property, don't take a picture that reveals your surroundings, property, or your vehicle period. The fact that this tool sent a picture that included his license plate is beyond stupid, which is why he has earned the title of Douche Bag of the Week.

Congradulations douche bag.

Boy in suitcase was cult victim, police say

Excerpted from CNN:

A toddler whose remains were found inside a suitcase in Philadelphia in the spring was starved to death by members of a religious cult, including his mother, in part because he refused to say "amen" after meals, police said.

Ria Ramkissoon, the mother of Javon Thompson, was charged Sunday with first-degree murder in the boy's death. A Baltimore judge denied bail for the 21-year-old woman, who is accused accused of starving her toddler to death while a member of a cult.

Her lawyer, Steven Silverman, said she "was not in control of the situation" when her son died.

Ramkissoon and four others identified by police as members of a cult called 1 Mind Ministries are charged with first-degree murder in the death of Javon Thompson.

Members did not seek medical care for Javon when he stopped breathing, and the boy died in his mother's arms, according to court documents that described police interviews with a confidential informant and two children. He would have been about 19 months old when police say adults stopped feeding him in December 2006.

Yep, what need today is more of that ole timey religion...

Debunking McCain's supposed environmentalist stance

I am sure by now that you have been feed the line that McCain is better than Bush because he at least acknowledges that our dependence on oil is a problem for both our environment and our economy. You may have even bitten the hook of his all of the above energy policy which emphasizes the need for off-shore drilling, but did you know that the other options he supposedly supports have gotten a little neglect from the "Environmental Republican"?

Excerpted from The New York Times:

John McCain recently tried to underscore his seriousness about pushing through a new energy policy, with a strong focus on more drilling for oil, by telling a motorcycle convention that Congress needed to come back from vacation immediately and do something about America’s energy crisis. “Tell them to come back and get to work!” McCain bellowed.

Sorry, but I can’t let that one go by. McCain knows why.

It was only five days earlier, on July 30, that the Senate was voting for the eighth time in the past year on a broad, vitally important bill — S. 3335 — that would have extended the investment tax credits for installing solar energy and the production tax credits for building wind turbines and other energy-efficiency systems.

Both the wind and solar industries depend on these credits — which expire in December — to scale their businesses and become competitive with coal, oil and natural gas. Unlike offshore drilling, these credits could have an immediate impact on America’s energy profile.

Senator McCain did not show up for the crucial vote on July 30, and the renewable energy bill was defeated for the eighth time. In fact, John McCain has a perfect record on this renewable energy legislation. He has missed all eight votes over the last year — which effectively counts as a no vote each time. Once, he was even in the Senate and wouldn’t leave his office to vote.

Hey Obama, if you want to win, you might want to bring this up.

Ryan's Mutant Fish

Ryan's Mutant Fish
Originally uploaded by Mildly Brilliant

Ryan's fish are freakishly big. I sometimes wonder if he feeds them plutonium. I can understand the Oscar being as big as it is, but the Plecostimous? That, I don't know about...

Internets Problem Solved

Well after much struggling with my inner tightwad, I finally broke down and purchased an iPhone. This should help me pay my bills since I do the majority of my billing online. Also, my old Razor was crapping out. Now to find a job to pay this damn thing off.

GAO: Most U.S. Corps. Don't Pay Income Tax

Excerpted from The Associated Press:

The Government Accountability Office is set to release a report that says most U.S. corporations pay no federal income taxes.

And most foreign companies that do business in the United States aren't paying corporate taxes.

The study says about two-thirds of American corporations paid zero income taxes to Uncle Sam between 1998 and 2005.

An even higher percentage of foreign corporations avoided federal corporate taxes. At the same time, said the GAO, the firms had trillions of dollars in sales.

And yet I who struggle below the poverty line have to pay taxes? Correct me if I am wrong, but wasn't the income tax originally aimed at corporations?

Quote Du Jour

"Bush has been the most fiscally irresponsible president in history, taking surpluses that equaled 2.5 percent of GDP and turning them into deficits that are 3 percent. This is a $4 trillion hit on the country's balance sheet. On the central issue of energy policy, Bush has been utterly obstructionist, recycling the self-serving arguments of industry lobbyists."

--Fareed Zakaria

WSJ: (Obama) Too Fit to be President?

More fine reporting from the bloviating douche bags at The Wall Street Journal:

The candidate has been criticized by opponents for appearing elitist or out of touch with average Americans. A Wall Street Journal/NBC News poll conducted in July shows Sen. Obama still lags behind Republican John McCain among white men and suburban women who say they can't relate to his background or perceived values.

"He's too new ... and he needs to put some meat on his bones," says Diana Koenig, 42, a housewife in Corpus Christi, Texas, who says she voted for Sen. Hillary Clinton in the Democratic primary.

"I won't vote for any beanpole guy," another Clinton supporter wrote last week on a Yahoo politics message board.

The last overweight president to be elected was 335-pound William Howard Taft in 1908. As for tall and lanky presidents, "you might have to go back to Abraham Lincoln" in 1860, says presidential historian Stephen Hess. "Most presidents were sort of in the middle."

Seriously, so now not only do we need our leaders to be intellectual duds but they have to have a beer gut as well. I weep for this nation. Hey Mainstream Media: Here's an idea, maybe you should be reporting on policy issues rather than potential headlines for the next Inquirer or Weekly World News... Or maybe you should just go with another sighting of Batboy.

Does a President need to be smart?

I know this is old, but considering the press' obsession with Obama's popularity abroad, fitness, and values as bad things; I figured what the Hell, let's through in a good old fashion taste of anti-intellectualism as well.

Rage Against the Machine to play at Target during RNC

Excerpted from The Star Tribune:

Political rap-rock giants Rage Against the Machine will give a rare performance at Target Center in Minneapolis on Sept. 3, which not so coincidentally is the same week as the Republican National Convention in St. Paul. Tickets go on sale Saturday at 10 a.m. for $60.

Target Center's news release for the concert makes no mention of any political overtones, but fans know to expect plenty of verbal fireworks. Rage guitarist Tom Morello has already committed to perform with country-rocker Steve Earle at a union rally Sept. 1 at St. Paul's Harriet Island, the first day of the convention. The band has lashed out at the Bush administration at other shows this year, including last weekend's Lollapalooza festival in Chicago. Morello expressed interest this summer in performing during both party conventions.

This ought to be amusing... It is about time RATM got off their asses and played. If there ever was an administration to rage against, it is this one.

Obama: "It's like they take pride in being ignorant."

Now if Obama could speak like this every time a stupid smear ad came up I wouldn't be so worried because the simple fact remains that a lot of Americans fall for stupid shit like tire gauges with "Obama's Energy Plan" written on them.

Praying for health

Excerpted from The Economist:

SOME people, notably Richard Dawkins, an evolutionary biologist at Oxford University, regard religion as a disease. It spreads, they suggest, like a virus, except that the “viruses” are similar to those infecting computers—bits of cultural software that take over the hardware of the brain and make it do irrational things.

Corey Fincher, of the University of New Mexico, has a different hypothesis for the origin of religious diversity. He thinks not that religions are like disease but that they are responses to disease—or, rather, to the threat of disease. If he is right, then people who believe that their religion protects them from harm may be correct, although the protection is of a different sort from the supernatural one they perceive.

Personally I think it stems from lack of education, but this is an interesting theory.

Quote Du Jour

I know this is old, but since I have decided to once again write Dr. Dobson on my other blog that it is once again relevant:

"The boy's father has to do his part. He needs to mirror and affirm his son's maleness. He can play rough-and-tumble games with his son, in ways that are decidedly different from the games he would play with a little girl. He can help his son learn to throw and catch a ball. He can teach him to pound a square wooden peg into a square hole in a pegboard. He can even take his son with him into the shower, where the boy cannot help but notice that Dad has a penis, just like his, only bigger."

--Dr. James Dobson